It was the summer I graduated from college and had high hopes to move to Philly to live with Felicia and Kathy. I went there for 2 weeks to find a job. I had my resume ready and had high hopes to land a job of a CEO of a big company and be written about in the TIMES magazine.
I am just kidding.
Kathy and I went from hiring agency to hiring agency and handed in our resumes. Mostly we heard back a "We'll call you if something comes up", which never happened. I did get a great job at the U, but it was back in SD. Which, I was grateful for at the time even though it meant that living in the city was a dream that floated by.
I think that whole experience put a bit of fear in me. Ever since then I have really dreaded looking for a job. And the last stint of working at the design agency just reinforced that fear.
Now I have my resume ready and I sent it off to a few jobs I thought I could do well and got emails back right away that they have either hired someone else or I don't have enough experience. That's normal, I know. I sent my resume to Neil's agent, even though she deals with mostly construction industry, she said that she knows people. I am hoping that she is on a vacation because I have not heard anything back. I know I should not be saying it but I am a bit nervous about it all.
The other Sunday we were at the church and the pastor was talking about 2008 and the year ahead that it will bring. He tied it in with the story about Israelites being in the desert for 40 years. And about how they should have followed God's direction and trusted. And that God told Joshua three times "Do not be afraid, I am with you".
Also, Felicia sent me a little article about fear and how it's not what we should be focusing on. She had no idea, even I had no idea I will be dealing with this now.
It's amazing how God speaks to us in ways we never expect. It's amazing that I heard and read these things before and as I was facing this. And deep down I have a complete confidence that it will work out, that I will find the job I am meant to be at. Now I just need to get through the process. But every time that fear creeps in, I remind myself that there is no reason for fear.