Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Silencing myself

About a year ago I heard someone speak about silencing themselves on the inside and it really intrigued me.

When I tried it, first, I became very aware of how chaotic my thoughts are.
Later, even a minute long attempt turned into a nap or the thoughts inside resembled a group of six year-olds running around.
Then I gave up.

I heard of this idea in the context of Christianity and God and I am not interested in this in any other context. I know that this is not new and I am sure that other religions practice it with great devotion. It's not widely discussed among the Christian circles but something deep in me draws me to the idea.

To me, even concentrating for a prayer is hard sometimes. There are thoughts bouncing inside me and it seems like only when I am doing something am I able to somewhat control what is happening in my head. Over the years I've noticed that unless I am doing about two things at once, I feel like I am wasting time. I am a master at double-tasking.

For me, mastering the art of silence would be similar to climbing the Everest. Being able to quiet my thoughts and focus on only one thing - God. I think the art of it would result in an inner peace. I am still trying to figure out how to do it and how to do it right.

2 comments:

yellowgirl said...

You know what the best thing for me in that respect has been? Yoga. My instructor does a great job of teaching meditation, and she thinks it's very important. Of course, there are the underlying comments of 'focusing inward' etc, that aren't in line with Christian principles... but I just do the meditation, and focus on God and silencing myself before God. It's totally worship for me. I skipped yoga this month... this makes me want to get back to it.

kristaliukas@yahoo.com said...

Ags, Elizabeth Gilbert describes in a funny way a conversation between her inner self and her mind in a book called Eat Pray Love. She was trying to meditate but couldn't silence her mind. As I was reading that chapter today, I remembered your blog and had to go back and comment on it :) It is a pretty cool book (the movie with Julia Roberts is about to come out) and if you haven't read it yet, let me know and I will send you a copy.