My little phone app says that only 4 weeks and 1 day are left to go. This is the last stretch in what has been a really good pregnancy. I can't say that it has been particularly hard, but then again, I was and still am determined not to complain and to enjoy it. I look at it as a gift that will last only 9 months and something that only I will have received.
Of course that there have been parts that have been harder rather than easier, right now even walking seems a tasks. But it's ok, I remind myself that my body was made for this and I would not change it for anything!
I am not sure that I am ready for it yet. I have not taken child birth classes but I have been watching and reading a lot of stuff. I don't know if that's a mistake, will tell you when it's all over :) The reality and stories from friends do make me a little weary at times but I am comforted by the thought that I really do trust my doctor and that we all were born and our moms made it - most of them without classes.
I am wondering what he looks like, I am wondering what it will feel like to hold him, I am wondering how big is this love that all new parents say that they didn't know exist until they held their baby for the first time. I am wondering how I will cope with the sleepless nights and praying that breastfeeding and labor, the two things that seem to be stumbling blocks to some, happen easy. I would love to be able to breastfeed, besides all the health benefits, I think it must be an amazing way to bond with the baby and I really want to experience that. I am also wondering what it will be like to be a mommy and I am wondering what it will be like to have the man I married and know as a husband be a daddy. I wonder how we will make it on one salary.
I am going into this with certain things that I would like to happen but keeping an open mind and ready to be flexible. I am so looking forward to this new chapter and hoping that through tiredness I am able to see what's important and what's not and enjoy the ride. Even the first few weeks, which everyone says are very hard.
I am so excited to become a mommy. I am so ready for it! This baby is so welcome and so expected!